Fun Facts & Riddles
- Why We Love Children!
1) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a
note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by
this child are not necessarily those of his parents."
2) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During
her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter
to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you
right now. She's hitting the bottle."
3) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I
was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and
down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?" "Yes," I answered
and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed
help I should ask the police. Is that right?" "Yes, that's right,"
I told her."Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward
me,"would you please tie my shoe?"
4) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of
the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was
barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. "Is that a dog
you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled,
the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally
he said, "What'd he do?"
5) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly
shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon
rounds.
She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old
age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I
found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As
I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she
merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe
this!"
6) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she
saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't
wear thatsuit." "And why not, darling?" "You know that it always
gives you a headache the next morning."
7) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our
minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his
collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had
found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be
performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then
dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The
minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with
sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father
always said: "Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and
into the hole he goooes."
8) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm
just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I
can't write and they won't let me talk!"
